More Irish Countryside Adventures!
SW Architecture Workshop Summary
Wearable and Pervasive Computing
We Don't Get No Respect! (Panel)
App Service Providers Tutorial
Winning Limericks
Window on the World
Issue 2
Limerick Competion Results @ ICSE2000
Prof. David Gries has delivered his verdict! Below you can read the full story:
In judging this contest, I first weeded out the entries that were not really limericks. They didn’t have the metre, the rhythm. Next, I looked for several things—of course, a winner did not have to have all these qualities: Was it related to this conference? Was it clever? Did it have a real message? Was it funny? Did it meet the constraints of the contest?
A lim’rick, to really be fine,
Must adhere to syllable and rhyme
Ours cannot be crude
Or indecent or lews
Or the Gries will assses you a fine
Read as:
a LIM’-rick, to REAL-ly be FINE
must ad-HERE to syl-LA-ble and RHYME
ours CAN-not be CRUDE
or in-DE-cent or LEWD
or the GRIES will as-SESS you a FINE
I decided to have two categories: (0) limericks related to CS and this conference and (1) Limericks that were ingenious. None, to my mind, fit both categories.
And I ended up with
A tie for the winner in category (0) and one winner in category (1)!
Split the money between them.
I also include some "honorable mentions". With each, I also give you some help on how to read it. Please read the limericks with the right rhythm!
TIE FOR WINNER
Name: Jamie Andrews
Email:andrews@csd.uwo.ca
Date: Tuesday, May 16, 2000 at 21:55:36
This limerick touches on this conference as a whole, in a very nice way. The last line is unexpected.
To the banks of the beautiful Shannon
Came the scions of Ghezzi and Gannon,
Of Tai, Clarke and Garlan,
Dave, Edsger and Harlan...
...To hear talks that ran on and ran on!
Read as follows. Just before the last line, give a pause, let people anticipate; then drag out "that ran on and ran on", giving the idea of them running on and on.
To the BANKS of the BEAU-tiful SHAN-non Came the SCI-ons of GET-zi and GAN-non, Of TAI, Clarke and GAR-lan, Dave, EDS-ger and HAR-lan...
...To HEAR talks that RAN on and RAN-on!
Name: Mary Shaw (synopsis of my SE Ed roadmap)
Email:mary.shaw@cs.cmu.edu
Date: Friday, May 26, 2000 at 05:46:44
The nice thing about this limerick is that it is tied directly to a paper—Shaw’s synopsis of her SE Ed roadmap.
A coder of software was glad
For the "engineer" title he had.
But he’d learned just to hack,
Not to think, choose, or track.
So the client’s big startup went bad
Read as:
A CO-der of SOFT-ware was GLAD
For the "EN-gineer" TI-tle he HAD.
But he’d LEARNED just to HACK,
Not to THINK, choose, or TRACK.
So the CLI-ent’s big START-up went BAD
HONORABLE MENTIONS
Name: Neil M. Goldman
Email:goldman@isi.edu
Date: Tuesday, April 4, 2000 at 18:15:47
A GOOD limerick—but nothing to do with ICSE
An old man with a house on the Finn chose to prepare for Atlantic El Ninos.
He caulked both his Doors,
tarred his Roof and his Floors,
yet he drowned, due to leaks in his Windows.
Read as:
An old MAN with a HOUSE on the FINN chose to pre-PARE for AtLANtic El NIN-os.
He CAULKED both his DOORS,
tarred his ROOF and his FLOORS,
yet he DROWNED due to LEAKS in his WIN-dows.
Name: Jochen Ludewig
Email:Jochen.Ludewig@informatik.uni-stuttgart.de
Date: Monday, May 15, 2000 at 13:11:10
There is software without engineering
which never receives any clearing.
Still, the money they earn
is convincing. They turn
lots of garbage to dollars and cheering.
Read as:
There is SOFT-ware with-OUT engin-EER-ing which NE-ver re-CEIVES any CLEAR-ing.
Still, the MO-ney they EARN
is con-VINC-ing. They TURN
lots of GAR-bage to DOL-lars and CHEER-ing.
INGENIOUS CATEGORY
The most ingenious limerick comes from Michael Breen. If you look at his web page, given in the limerick as http www.ul.ie/~breenm, you will find many limericks that were banned from the contest. Michael’s way of telling us about this is ingenious. It takes practice to say the last line well.
Name: Michael Breen
Email:mbreen@acm.org
Date: Saturday, May 27, 2000 at 12:16:35
At a haych then two tees and a pee
Three double ewes dot you elle dot eye ee
By rules exiled from here
On his page will appear
Tilde breen m’s verse atility
Read as:
At a HAYCH then two TEES and a PEE
Three double EWES dot you ELLE dot eye EE
By rules EXILED from HERE
On his PAGE will apPEAR
Tilde BREEN m’s verse A-tili-TY
HONORABLE MENTION
The ingenuity is in the last line, which contains a procedure call. Unfortunately, this doesn’t come across orally, only on paper. It has a disinctly original ending to the last three lines.
Name: Stephan Herrmann
Email:stephan@cs.tu-berlin.de
Date: Wednesday, May 24, 2000 at 10:22:17
There was a wise man of name Derick.
His software was fast and generic.
It returned on the spot,
which its author did not,
after "finding:all[Pubs,in](Limerick)".
Read as:
There WAS a wise MAN of name DER-ick.
His SOFT-ware was FAST and gen-ER-ic.
It re-TURNED on the SPOT,
which its AU-thor did NOT,
after FIND-ing all PUBS in LimER-ick.
Designer
and Webmistress
Caroline Kehoe